Sticks and Stones

Sticks and Stones and the Power of Silence

Not every opinion deserves a response. Not every comment deserves space in your spirit and not every voice deserves access to your peace.

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me.”

For a long time, I didn’t fully believe that saying.
There was a season in my life where I was quick to lash back, quick to defend my honour or quick to explain myself. Snarky comments used to upset me. Opinions from strangers felt personal. I felt the need to state my case, to correct the narrative and to be heard.

However, what I’ve learned - both through my own growth and through the people I’ve coached - is that this reaction is human. When you care deeply, when you are healing, when you are becoming more visible, words can feel heavier than they should. We mistake reacting for strength, when in reality, it’s often a sign that something inside us is still asking to be validated, but over the years, something changed. Not overnight - and not without effort - but with intention.

Now, I filter comments differently. I’ve learned to recognize ill intent and let it dissolve before it ever reaches my heart. I don’t absorb energy that was never meant to build me and what I’ve noticed is this: the harshest words almost always come from people who don’t know you at all. They don’t know your story, your struggles, your growth or the full picture behind a single post. They don’t take the time to understand - yet, they’re quick to judge.

As a life coach, this is something I see time and time again with my clients. People speak from their level of awareness, not yours. They comment from their pain, not your purpose. When you understand that, you stop taking things personally that were never truly about you in the first place.

People will always project their own insecurities, wounds and unresolved pain onto others. You don’t know who hurt them, you don’t know who broke them and honestly, you don’t need to. If someone chooses to waste their own energy and minutes of their life leaving distasteful comments, so be it. That choice says nothing about your worth and everything about where they are in their own journey.

I see it, but I don’t react, because reaction gives power and I am intentional about where mine goes. I don’t let it disturb my peace. I don’t let it shape my mood or my worth. I simply keep living my life the way I choose to live it - freely, authentically and unapologetically. That doesn’t mean I’m numb or indifferent. It means I’ve learned discernment. I choose what I carry and I choose what I release.

For me, my grounding runs even deeper. I am blessed, I am highly favoured and most importantly, I am deeply loved by God. That truth outweighs any comment, opinion or assumption made by a stranger behind a screen. When your identity is rooted in something unshakable, outside voices lose their grip.

So I scroll by, I block, I unfollow or I delete. What I no longer do is internalize it, because the need to comment negativity on someone else’s life says far more about the commenter than it ever will about me and in all honesty, it doesn’t make me angry - it makes me feel sorry for them. Peace isn’t found in proving a point; it’s found in knowing who you are.

Peace is powerful. Silence is strength and choosing not to engage is not weakness - it’s growth. I protect my peace and I wouldn’t trade it for anything!

If you’re reading this and feeling triggered, drained or weighed down by other people’s opinions, let this be your reminder: you don’t owe anyone access to your energy. You are allowed to choose peace over performance, alignment over approval and faith over fear.

Sometimes, the most powerful response…
is no response at all.

Ask yourself: What would change if I stopped explaining myself to people who were never listening?

With you on the journey,
– Storm Reagan
Life Coach | Lived Experience Guide